The Love of a Brother The Love of a Triplet
by Laura-Stars
Summary: Triplets. Three siblings born on the same day. They have an extraordinary bond. But when the leading triplet is no longer there, Max and Cody must carry on. They must carry on without Zack.
1. Chapter 1

**The Love of a Brother. The Love of a Triplet**

**Summary: My name is Maxine Martin. Daughter to Carey Martin, sister and fellow triplet to Zack and Cody Martin. Or at least I was. Yeah, being a triplet was annoying, and sometimes they really annoyed me in our squished hotel suite. But I could never imagine a world without Zack. He just…disappeared. **

_**Disclaimer: I do not own The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, I am just a huge fan that refuses to believe it's gone. **_

"Max! Wake up," Cody yelled in my ear, sitting on the edge of our bed. "I need your help to get Zack up so we're not late for school,"

"We're never late," I mumbled, turning over. "You always get us there half an hour early,"

"You know what they say," Cody said, standing on my bed as if about to make a speech, "The early bird catches the word!"

"Well make Zack the early bird next time," I said, defeat, starting to sit up. I looked round our stupid cramped room. Cody hidden away on his bottom bunk with a towel, whilst Zack snored above. There was a desk next to my bed, but it was so badly cluttered with old school assignments there was no point. Zack's was pretty similar, except cluttered with food, mostly. Then Cody's desk was perfect as a pin, obviously. Our closets pretty much worked the same way. My clothes were all shoved in, (Not that I wore most of them), Zack had food and other junk in his, and Cody's was pristine and perfect. Zack and I found Cody's perfection annoying.

I got up and went over to the bunk bed, grabbing Zack's ankles and pulling him off the bed. "I fricking hate you sometimes, Max_ine_," he said, turning to me.

"I hate you to, Zack_ary_," I teased back with a smile.

"Zack, language," Cody huffed.

"American," Zack replied with a smile, thinking he was clever.

"You mean English, dufus," I said, slapping him playfully round the head. As much as we teased each other, I loved Zack. He was the only one who knew my insecurities with being a girl, and why I always wore my cap. It was my identity. And although he called me Maxine, he knew how much it hurt me when other people did it.

I started to get ready, looking in the mirror at my shoulder length brown hair and brown eyes. How could I look like this when my fellow triplets had matching blond hair and blue-green eyes? I thought I took after my father, Kurt Martin, but I wasn't too sure. I quickly ran a brush through it, then tied it into plates and carefully placed it in my cap. Then I pulled my stupid bangs up a bit too so I could hardly be mistaken for a girl. Yeah, there were days I wore my hair down and my girly clothes, but that was very rarely.

Grabbing some jeans and a t-shirt, I darted into the bathroom to get changed. I used to get changed in front of the boys no problem. But I was twelve, things were changing. Maybe not for them, but I needed my space.

.

When we'd forced down mom's terrible cooking we went to school. We didn't really have many friends. We'd moved to the area when we were 10 and just stuck together, really. I liked it that way, but I could tell Zack was getting sick of it. As I'd told Cody, we were half an hour early.

"Aw, man!" Zack moaned, "Max this is all your fault. I could've slept for another half hour,"

"Don't blame me," I said defensively holding my arms up, "Cody got me up,"

Cody smiled.

"Shut up," Zack snapped at him.

"I didn't even say anything!" Cody wined.

"Well, I know what you were thinking, we're twins,"

"You're not twins," I yelled. I hated it when people called them that. "You are two identical triplets," that's what mom had told me.

"Yeah, yeah," Zack dismissed my point. "What are we fighting for anyway?"

"We are not fighting," Cody argued. "We're having a creative discussion."

"Shut up," I snapped. "Hey, Zack, you wanna shoot some hoops?"

"Sure!" Zack replied happily.

"Guys, can I play?" Cody asked.

"Oh, you see, this is more of a one-on-one drill," I smiled at Zack, "And Zack's better than you,"

Zack and I ran off happily as Cody followed. I never felt mean because of the amount of stuff I get excluded from for being a girl.

I beat Zack (obviously), but if there's one thing I know about Zack Martin, is that he can't stand losing to a girl.

"I let you win," he argued.

"Just like you let me win last time, and the time before, and the time before…" I trailed off.

"Shut up,"

"Hey," I voice said from behind us. We all turned to see Tapeworm, our friend, stood behind us.

"Hey," I replied, as the twins rolled their eyes. They thought I liked Tapeworm, as if?! Zack didn't really like Tapeworm, he thought he was weird. Cody liked him. I'll admit, he was all right. And he'd been quiet nice to me in the two years we'd been in Boston. At least, when he realized I was a girl. Before that, it was just awkward.

"Can I play?" he asked, smiling slightly while he towered above me.

"Sure!" Zack said. I turned, and saw Cody's sad face.

"Zack," I hissed.

"What? I thought you liked Tapeworm?"

"Yeah, but this is a one-on-one drill,"

"Well, we'll change it," he shrugged. "I don't get what the problem is,"  
"You wanna know what the problem is?" I challenged. "You are constantly a dick to Cody. If he can't play, why can Tapeworm?"

Zack shrugged. "I dunno, why don't you stop playing?"

"Me?" I asked in shock.

"Yeah, you are the girl."

Tears were in my eyes by now. "I. Hate. You." I stuttered, running away.

"What's up with her," I heard Zack ask behind me. I hate it when people mistake me for a boy, but I hate it more when I'm excluded from things for being a girl. Especially when Zack did it.

I ran home to the Tipton. I didn't care about missing school. That was probably the main thing Zack and I had in common. Whenever Cody was ill or on a school trip, we'd ditch together. But he was too mean to Cody. Okay, maybe I was over-reacting to that, but he called me a girl. I know I am a girl…urge! Why's everything so complicated?

As I walked into the lobby, unfortunately for me, mom was there talking to Mr. Mosby about a raise.

"Max!" she said surprised as I walked in, and I paused wide-eyed staring in shock.

"You want Max pay?" Mr. Mosby replied in shock. "Carey! You do know that will never happen.

"No, sorry, I mean that's Max over there. Never mind, Mr. Mosby," she came over to me and scowled down at me. "Explain,"

"I left," I said simply, "Zack pissed me off,"

"Language!" She scolded.

"English," I replied cheekily, copying Zack.

"Maxine, you're grounded for a very long time,"

"When you say grounded, does that include the pool?"

"Yes,"

"What about dance lessons,"

She sighed, knowing they were the most important things to me. "Maybe, but for now, up to our room. I don't want to be the bad person whose child ran away from school and went back. You're ill."

.

"Hi, this is she," Mom answered the phone as I miserably sat on the couch. "Really? Oh," I could see tears rubbing down her cheeks. "I'll be there right away,"

"What's happened?" I asked suddenly really worried.

"Z-Zack," she stuttered. "We're going to the school, now!"

"Okay," I replied, starting to cry. I didn't know what it was, but knew it was serious. Mom hailed a cab and we were over there immediately. Everyone was crowding round the tallest school building. A police car had just pulled up, and were starting to question Tapeworm and his parents. Cody ran up to us, sobbing.

"What happened?" I asked frantically.

"It's Zack," he cried. "He's-he's dead! Tapeworm pushed him," he started downright crying on his knees. I was sad, it felt like a part of me had gone. But I couldn't cry. Why couldn't I cry? Drew and his crew came over to me, and they actually looked sincere. Unlike most new kids, Drew was nice to me at first. He called the boys clones, but liked me. Well, till he realized I was a girl.

"I'm sorry for your loss," he said to all of us. I actually saw tears in his eyes, "If there's anything I can do," he pulled me into a hug and started sobbing.

Why couldn't I cry? Mom was beside herself with tears, as she ran to see the body, now being taken away by an ambulance. A camera crew was starting to film the scene, whilst a news reporter talked. He started to come over to Cody and I, obviously recognising Cody.

"Are you the other two triplets?" he checked as we nodded. He turned to me as I was more pulled together than my remaining other third. "How did this happen?"

I shrugged, "I was h-home s-s-sick," I stuttered.

"Ah, and what's your name then, sir,"  
"Max_ine_," I replied coldly, but I couldn't believe that was bothering me more.

"So sorry," the man replied. "Are you in any way related to the deceased?"

"I'm his sister," I replied, thankfully feeling a tear on my cheek. "I _was_,"

"Ah, it's hard," he put an arm round me. "I'm sorry for your loss," he started to walk away and talk to the camera. Why did everyone keep saying that? 'I'm sorry for your loss'. It wasn't exactly their fault. And they were making it worse, they kept reminding us Zack was gone. But it just didn't feel real. How could Zack be gone just like that, it felt like he's just…disappeared.

And it was all Tapeworm's fault.

**A/N So…this is my new story that came to me in a dream last night. It was originally gonna be an OC for the third triplet, but as I wrote, Max just seemed better. I might not be able to update for a while, it depends if I get Wi-Fi on holiday x.**

**Anyway, please tell me what you think! And I'll put a question at the end of each chapter.**

**Question: Who's your favourite Suite Life character and why?**

**My Answer: Max. Because I love her tomboy-ness and her relationship with Zack, even though I was jealous when I was like, five. I also really like Alyson Stoner and with she was in season 3 and On Deck. **

**Thanks for reading! Now let me know what you think x. **


	2. Chapter 2

It felt as if life stopped when we went home. The school day was ended early, whilst the police investigated what'd happened. We weren't allowed to see the body, not that I really wanted to. Seeing Zack asleep creped me out enough. As we solemnly walked into the busy lobby, everyone stared at us as Cody broke down crying again. He was more than just crying he was screaming. I shed a few tears as well, but was still in denial. Maddie came over as soon as she saw.

"Hey, what happened?" she asked, calmly putting her arm around me.

"Z-Z-Zack," I stuttered through gulps of sobs. "He's d-d-d-d-d-,"

"He's what?" Maddie asked confused.

"He's dead!" I got out before collapsing on the floor in tears. Mom just stood there and froze, as Maddie started to cry.

"What is the meaning off all this?" Mr. Mosby asked, coming over. "Our guests don't pay to hear crying!"

"But, Mr. Mosby," Maddie argued as tears started to fall. "Zack died this morning," she half whispered.

"Oh," Mr. Mosby sighed. "I understand," he started to cry but tried to remain professional. "I'm sorry for your loss," he walked away to cry in the corner. That's when I truly grasped it.

Zack was dead. He wasn't coming back. The last thing I'd said to him was, 'I hate you'. Guilt built up inside me as I crawled into a ball and cried. I wanted to die too. Slowly we all made our way to the elevator, and up to the 23rd floor.

You know when people are dead, usually it's best to wait a few days before going to their room. Do you know how hard it is when you literally have to go into their room, because it's yours as well? Very. Cody wouldn't stop crying, as he sat and rocked in the far corner. Mom just sat on the couch, still staring straight ahead. I didn't know what to do with myself, so I opened the window and slipped out onto the little ledge. I'd been going there since we'd first moved, I was a small ledge, which I probably could easily fall off if I wasn't careful. But I sat there anyway, it was my escape, no one else knew. And the vent opening was the perfect hiding place. I kept food, because once I was out there for 5 hours, along with a book and a stolen MP3 player.

I started to play the music, as I sadly ate a bag of crisps. They were Dorito's, Zack's favourite. I couldn't help thinking of him. Zack. My triplet brother. It truly felt like a part of me was missing. Zack had always joked around with me, and I'd never felt so lonely. We'd entered dancing competitions (although he wasn't very serious) and been in a band. But his was gone. I took my hat of my head in anger, throwing it down, before undoing my hair. I was a girl, just like Zack said.

I sighed, and reached into the vent, finding an egg I'd left there the other day. My eyes locked on Tapeworms house, and I flung it at his window. I was a pretty good aim, so it went straight on his window, even though I couldn't really see too well from a distance.

"Hey, little girl!" a woman yelled, making me turn to a window. "What gives you the right to throw eggs at innocent people's house?"

"He isn't innocent." I hissed. "He killed my brother,"

"Is your brother the blond one?" She asked, jumping to conclusions. "I saw him a minute ago, so he can't be dead,"

"They're twins," I muttered in annoyance. "Only one of them is dead,"

"You shouldn't even be out here, it's not safe."

I grunted loudly. "Good," I said, slipping off the ledge and starting to fall.

Time seemed to slow down as I fell towards the Tipton entrance steps. I didn't really want to die, I realized, I wanted to be with Zack. I'd seen how distraught mom and Cody had been, I would only make it worse. I was selfish. I shut my eyes tightly getting ready to hit the ground.

The force and impact of the fall never came. But I did feel a set of hands around me, turning me upright then keeping the hands on my waist. I wanted to pull away but I was in too much shock.

"Are you okay?" a familiar voice asked me. I looked up to see it belonged to Drew.

"Physically or mentally?" I asked.

He pushed a loose strand of hair behind my ear. "Both," he whispered.

"Physically, I think. Mentally… not really."

"I'm sorry,"

"What for?"

"Being so mean to you and your brothers,"

I shrugged. "It's not your fault Zack died."

"I know," he sighed, reaching in his pocket. "When Tapeworm told Zack he was gonna die, and the more he told people the more painful it'd be, Zack wrote this note. He gave it to me because he only wanted you to see it, and didn't want Cody to know,"

"Oh…kay," I said confused, looking at the paper. 'Max' was scribbled out on the folded edge. I unfolded it to reveal a note.

_Tapeworm says I'm going to die. I'm sorry, Max. But don't let this effect you too much. You're not the one dead, so get on with your life. I'm not coming back. I forgive you for what happened this morning, I'm sorry for choosing Tapeworm. You've been such an amazing lil' sister, and I hope you never forget me. As for now, I'll be in a better place. Cody is still your big brother, let him take my job. But please, never say you're a twin. You'll always be a triplet even after I'm long gone. I love you, Maxine Martin. _

_Lots of love, _

_Zackary Martin._

I stared in shock, constantly re-reading the note. I knew it was from him because of the handwriting, but it made me sob more. The fact that I'd never see Zack again. But he was right in a way, I just wanted to wait till the next day to get on with my life. And I was still shaken up from the fall. I started to try and walk back inside, but Drew stopped me.

"Max, wait," he called, making me turn around. "Don't kill yourself, you've seen what happened to your family when Zack died,"  
I nodded, starting to cry as I ran inside. I ran up to the suite, feeling very self-conscious of my hair as I ran through the lobby.

.

Dad came home late evening. Cody was asleep on the floor and mom just stared straight ahead. I tried to sleep, but I couldn't.

"Hey," dad half-whispered, sitting down next to me. "It's a shame about Zack, eh?"

I nodded, beginning to hug dad some more. "I miss him," I cried.

"You will," Dad nodded. "The pain will never go away. We just have to learn to live with it," he started properly crying now.

"Yeah," I said, lying down on my back. Eventually I must've fallen asleep.

.

I woke up tiredly on the floor early evening. The first thing I noticed was how hungry I was. It felt like something was missing, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. I saw dad asleep next to me, then Cody close by. Mom was still just staring ahead. I looked at the clock, about dinner time. I made dinner quite a lot, because mom just couldn't cook. I made some pasta and heated up a sauce. A simple dinner. One of Zack's favourites.

_Zack's dead._ I remembered, as I poured the pasta into four bowls. I made a fifth, with the word 'Zack' written on it and left it on the window ceil. Just encase.

"Cody, wake up," I whispered, shaking him.

"Huh?" he sat up confused.

"I made dinner," I announced, handing him a bowl.

"I'm not hungry," he mumbled.

"Me neither," I lied. "But we need to eat, it's what Zack would've wanted." I left him with the bowl and fork as he picked at his dinner. "Dad, wake up," I whispered as he sat up. "I made dinner,"  
"Thanks honey," he muttered, starting to eat with his hands.

I knew mom would be the hardest. "Mom, I made dinner," I told her calmly.

"Zack," was the only response I got.

"Would want us to eat and survive," I finished. "Come on, he's in a better place." I said through tears. I missed Zack so much, but knew there was no point crying over it. In fact, I was probably the closest to Zack. I ate some of my pasta, before throwing the rest away and heading into my room. I could only last a second.

Zack's basketball hoop stood tall, and the dirty underwear and un-made bed that I used to hate, I now loved. My eyes caught on a photo of us all with London and Maddie. My hair in one plait, and us all smiling. That would never happen again. School photos, where the three of us used to hate having to share were now the most precious things. The same every year. Zack, me, and then Cody. And my 'creative' ways of getting away from the stupid 'no caps in photos' rule. Zack got me that cap when I was little, and now I'd never see it again.

Forget the cap, I'd never see Zack again.

**A/N So sorry for the long wait, the Wi-Fi at my hotel is crap! I probably won't be able to update till Tuesday the 9****th**** because of this. Also, do you want flashbacks because I've written some that could fit between chapters? Thanks. xx**

**Question: What music do you like?**

**My Answer: Mostly All Time Low and other Alternate rock.**

**Please tell me what you think! Thanks for reviews xx**


	3. FLASHBACK 1

**FLASHBACK**

_It was a good day for the Martin trio. They were 11, and their mom had agreed to take them to the beach, after years of begging. Zack wanted to talk to some hot babes, Cody wanted to read in the shade, and Max wanted to dance on the beach for quarters. Carey wanted to sunbathe, but knew she couldn't do that and keep an eye on her three preteens at the same time._

"_Listen, kids," she said in the car, interrupting their excited squeals as to what they wanted to do. "I can't have you all wandering off. Either all stick together, or two of you stay together and one comes with me. Cody, you could come and read with me. I'll just be sunbathing."_

"_No mom," Cody said impatiently. "I can't sit in the sun, I'll burn."  
"You can come with me," Max offered. "If I make enough money, I'll buy you an ice cream,"_

"_No, Max. You've got to come with me," Zack argued. "Cody would cramp my style, and I can't flirt with mom," he whispered the last part._

"_But I want to dance," Max argued. _

"_Tuff," Zack said. "I don't."_

"_Cody will come with me, won't you, Cody?" Max asked._

"_No, Cody's coming with me," Zack said, making Cody look confused._

"_I thought I'd 'cramp your style'," Cody glared at Zack, "Promise you'll buy me an ice cream?" he asked Max._

"_I promise." Max said, smirking at Zack._

"_Hey, hey, hey." Zack interrupted. "That'll hardly fair. Come on guys." He looked from Max to Cody, "Come on Max,"_

"_No," Max smiled. This was one of the rare times that Max and Zack didn't gang up on Cody._

"_I guess you're stuck with me," Carey said, as Zack sulked._

_._

_Max had a great time on the beach. She found a good spot, and put her boom box down. Chucking her cap down with a few quarters so people got the idea, she started to dance. Max took dance very seriously, with her mom paying for 3 classes a week, and her constant practice. So improvising was no big deal to her, she enjoyed it a lot._

"_Go Max! Go Max! Go Max!" Cody cheered, as a few people started to get the idea and dropped a quarter in the hat._

"_What's the cause?" an old woman asked Cody._

"_Uh-triplets!" Cody said, then started lying. "Out mom had two kids, then wanted another and got triplets. We struggle with money, now, and the three of us are all in one room. This money will buy us small things like ice cream and act as pocket money we don't get,"_

"_Aw, so where's the third?" the woman asked, believing every word._

"_Over there," Cody pointed to Zack, "He looks just like me."_

"_Wow, real life triplets. I'll never see that again." She put a three dollars in the hat. "One each. So, what are your names?"_

_Cody wanted to get out of the situation, but didn't know how. "Look, I'm really busy," he lied. "Why don't you go talk to Zack, over there?"_

_Max smiled at Cody, having heard every word._

"_Hey, Max. Can we go get ice cream now?" Cody asked, counting the money._

"_Buy your own ice cream," Max retaliated._

"_But, you promised." Cody's face fell._

_Max shrugged. "Promises are made to be broken." She said, as Cody stormed off._

_Max made a lot of money (like, 10 dollars) but knew she'd upset her brother. It didn't bother her much, she just put the money in her dance school fund, which she knew would never have enough for. Cody forgave her after a day, but her words stuck in his mind forever. And he never trusted her again._

"_**Promises are made to be broken,"**_

**A/N So, I got Wi-Fi again (yay!), but I takes forever to get it working. Anyway, I know this is short, but it makes the next chapter (chapter 3) make more sense. This was originally flashback 2, but the other one isn't needed for the plot, and it's a lot longer. I'll post it soon, after chapter 3. Anyways, a review would be nice!**

**Question: Do you like this fic?**

**My Answer: I don't know, it's better than other stuff I've written.**


	4. Chapter 3

I found my way to my bed, and stayed there for a very long time. I don't know when, but at some point Cody came in. He didn't go to his own bed, but I don't blame him. It wouldn't be the same without Zack's leg hanging over the side. He came into my bed, which I was very grateful of. Dad stayed for a while, but then he had to leave. He kissed our heads and said he would be back for the funeral. Mom started to move a bit more. Not much, but she did start living.

It was when a week had passed that we were disturbed. Mr. Mosby let himself in and started to talk to mom.

"Carey," he said. "I understand you're grieving, so it's fine that you miss work. But it's not fair on the boys,"  
"I'm a girl!" I yelled grouchily from my room.

"Sorry," he replied, which surprised me as he usually pulled a face or said something like 'whatever' or 'no one cares'. "But Carey, we've had suicidal jumps from your poor girl. Kurt says she's the only one ever making food, and Cody's not stirred from bed,"

Mom sighed, starting to cry. "It's just really hard. What should I do?"

Mr. Mosby handed some papers forward. "Sign these," he explained softly. "It will give the Tipton part-parenting of your twins…"

"We're triplets," I interrupted, getting no reply.

"While you get back on your feet," he explained. "Which we'll help you with."

"Uh, I'll have to talk about that with my kids," she said tiredly. "Maybe tomorrow,"

Mr. Mosby walked into our room and smiled at us. "Maxine, Cody, can you come out here for a second,"

"It's Max," I mumbled, walking into the living room.

"You can talk to your kids _now_," Mr. Mosby told mom.

Mom sighed. "Okay," she said, "Kids, do you think you'd be better off in part-care of the Tipton?"  
I shrugged. "Maybe,"

"What does it mean?" Cody asked.

"Sometimes you'll sleep here," Mr. Mosby explained. "And sometimes you'll stay elsewhere. The idea at the moment is to send you to summer camp, take you away so you can grieve."

I looked at Cody, and he nodded. "Okay," I answered.

"One condition though," Mr. Mosby stopped me. "No suicide attempts,"

"Please, honey, we're in enough pain,"

I nodded. "Sorry."

"Please sign here," Mr. Mosby said, as mom signed us away. "Come with me," Mr. Mosby instructed as we left the hotel suite. He led us down to the lobby, then into his car. When we go to his house he spoke again. "You'll be staying with me the next few days," he explained.

"Okay," I said again.

"I know you came empty-handed, but I've got kids who can lend. I'll show you to your rooms,"

We walked into his house, it was surprisingly clean, and he led us up the perfectly vacuumed stairs.

"Lola," he said, knocking on a door, as a blonde girl who looked about a year younger than me, but was still my height, came out.

"Yes?" she said, her eyes drifting to Cody and me.

"This is Maxine, and I was wondering if you'd share with her for the next few days."

"Is this one of the three boys you always moan about? The one you said is actually a girl,"

"I am a girl!" I put in defensively.

"Yes, and I'd appreciate it if you don't mention that." Mr. Mosby hissed.

"Wait, where's the third?" Lola asked.

"I'll explain later, for now. Max, Lola. Lola, Max. Get along,"

I followed Lola into her room as Cody went to meet his roommate.

"Marion likes you best," Lola told me. "He thinks you're in trouble the least."

"Well, that's not exactly true. I tend to put the blame on… someone else," I felt sad talking about Zack, so I quickly changed the subject. "Why do you call him Marion if he's your dad?"

"Long term foster, hopefully adoptive dad," she explained happily. "I've lived here since I was seven."

"How old are you now?" I asked.

"Eleven," she smiled. "But enough about me, your brothers really hot, don't you think?"

_Wait till you see Zack,_ I thought, but managed out, "Uh, yeah I guess."

"What's your surname?"

"Martin,"

"Like Kurt Martin?"

"Yeah, exactly,"

"It's a shame his kid died, though," she looked into my eyes, suddenly realizing what had happened to me. "Max, I'm so sorry," she breathed.

I wiped a tear away. "It's okay, really, I'm fine,"

"You're not fine," Lola said, giving me a hug. "I lost my brother, when I was seven,"

"Really?"

"Yeah, mom couldn't cope, so dad had an affair. Mom got on the drugs and here I am,"

"How-how old was he?" I stuttered in shock. I wasn't alone.

"13, he committed suicide."

"Aw, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm used to it now. Kids come and go, but my family will always be here."

"D-does it still hurt,"

She shrugged. "A little, but I know suicide is the most selfish thing in the whole world."  
"I almost committed suicide," I admitted. "But I changed my mind halfway down the fall. I'm so glad someone caught me."

I don't know why, but talking to Lola made me feel a lot better. She was really nice and leant me clothes, and at night made sure I was all right with my bed. Cody came and said goodnight, hugging me super tight.

"I love you Max," he whispered. "Never try and kill yourself again,"

"I promise," I breathed.

.

I had awful dreams that night. My words 'I hate you' echoing in my mind. My guilt for thinking Tapeworm was alright. My guilt for saying I hated Zack. And my guilt for if anything goes wrong in this place, I said yes for me and Cody to go.

Zack walked up to me.

"Zack, is it really you," I asked.

Zack ignored me, and kept walking. When he got to me he pulled a gun and held it to his head.

"If you hate me, what've I got left?" he asked his words ringing in my ears.

"Zack… NO! I love you! Zack, please," I bellowed between screams, as Zack pulled the trigger. "Zack no!" I screamed as his body fell down. "Zack! Please! Please Zack! I love you. I love you more than anything!" I kept repeating.

"Max, wake up. It's just a dream," Lola soothed next to me as I woke up.

"He killed himself," I sobbed, "He killed himself because of me,"

"Max. It's not your fault," Lola said looking into my eyes. "I felt the same when Luis killed himself,"

"He didn't really kill himself. He was murdered,"

"Then why do you feel so bad?"

"The last thing I said to him was 'I hate you'," I sobbed.

"Why?"

"He called me a girl," I admitted. "And he was being a dick to Cody."

"You are a girl. But you're just as good as your brothers,"

I shrugged. "I just don't like talking about it."

"That's fine." She said, standing up. "But if you need anything I'll be in my bed."

.

When I did fall asleep, it wasn't for long because Lola woke me up for breakfast. I came out sleepily in her pink pyjamas. I took a look at Cody and knew he'd had a similar night.

"Morning," I muffled, as we walked down stairs.

"Morning," he echoed, obviously not in the mood to talk.

"Morning kids, sleep well?" a woman asked as we entered the kitchen. We all nodded. "I'm Mrs Millar, the cook. And you are…Max and Cody?" she pointed at the wrong one each name. What girl is called Cody?

"Actually, I'm Max and he's Cody," I said tiredly.

"Oh, sorry," Mrs Millar looked at us as if they were weird that way round. "Do you like chocolate pancakes?"  
If Zack had been there, he'd have been over the moon. But for Cody and me, it would just feel like we were eating them without him. Tears started to fall down my face at the thought of it.

"Oh, honey, it's okay," Mrs Millar put her plump arm around me. "You can have toast if you want?"

I wiped my tears and looked up, nodding. I knew it was going to be hard in this place.

Mr. Mosby came in soon after. He gave a light nod at Lola and Travis, but gave me and Cody both hugs. "Sleep well?" he asked as we both shrugged. "Don't worry, you'll learn to live with the pain."

"But Zack's gone," I sobbed. "He won't come back."

"I know," Mr. Mosby sighed, "The Tipton has had a great loss. Which reminds me, the funeral is in two days," when people say two days, I wonder whether they include that day, and the day the thing is happening, so I just nod. "Do you have any black?"

"No," Cody said as I shook my head.

"We'll buy you some, then. Mrs Millar will take you out to buy some flowers or something."

.

When the funeral did come, it was the second worse day of my life. I dressed all in black, and let my hair hang loose. It was held in the Tipton gardens, and everyone we knew were there. I held my bouquet tightly, with my speech locked away in my pocket as everyone came. All the teachers who'd given Zack detention were there. Every single girl who'd rejected him was there. Every class mate who'd never even spoken to him, showed up. The only one missing was Tapeworm.

Maddie was crying at the back, so I went and sat with her. She put an arm around me and cried on my shoulder. "I'm sorry for your loss," she croaked out.

I looked up at her. "It's your loss too," that was true, she was like an older sister to me. She just cried in response and hugged me more. Cody was a wreck. He sat in his reserved seat at the front, bawling his eyes out. I went to join him, and clutched his hand tightly. Mom looked like she'd been helped a bit, but was still looking a little confused.

Zack's coffin sat at the front, his body inside. He looked so peaceful, I had to keep telling myself he was in a better place as I put my flowers in, along with a note. I know it sounds silly, but I wanted to say goodbye.

_Dear Zack,_

_I know you're dead now, and probably won't get to read this, but I love you. I truly, truly do. I wish I'd gotten a chance to say goodbye. I'm sorry for all the times we fought, and I promise I will never forget you, Zackary Martin,_

_Yours sincerely,_

_Maxine Martin._

I tucked it into his pocket, then walked away crying. I tried to pull myself together, not just for me, but for mom and Cody. They took Zack's coffin and buried it. That was the last time I'd ever see Zack. Mom had bought two spaces next to it so we could all be buried together.

The ceremony was a bit of a blur to me. We sung some hymns, prayed, then it was my turn to read my speech. Cody and I walked up to the front together, paper tightly in our hands. We stood behind the podium, and started to read.

"Zackary Martin, best known as Zack, was a kind boy, and a great brother," I began.

"He was born in Boston along with his fellow triplets, Cody and Max," Cody read.

"That's us," I whispered, to try and interact with the audience. We'd planned it all out.

"Zack wasn't the best behaved, but he was certainly a good person,"

"He would stand up for his sister every time they moved school. We went to a lot of schools, and lived in a lot of places up till we were ten. Then we went to Buckner Middle School," I felt the tears in my eyes now.

"Whilst at Buckner Middle School," Cody continued. "Zack lived at the Tipton Hotel. Whilst at the Tipton he liked to cause trouble."

"He'd play on the luggage carts, invite loads of friends over, brake into secret weddings and much more,"

"But, although sometimes Zack was selfish, a lot of what he did was for others."  
"And Zack would always own up to what he'd done."

"He also got involved in many other activities,"

"Including helping to win Battle of the Bands and GoDance USA which got us a record deal, and helped me get in a music video. Zack was always nice."

"Until, one fateful school day, whilst Max was home sick, a boy took his dislike of Zack to another level." Cody was crying next to me as he said that and tears were on my cheeks. I knew it was my turn to say what'd happened.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, wiping away a tear. "A boy, a boy pushed him off a building," I cried.

"Zack was very loved," Cody tied to continue.

"And will be very missed," I added, taking a deep breath to say the next bit. "He's in a better place now,"  
"And he's not alone. Muriel, who passed away a while ago, can keep him company."

"Until, we too, will follow our brother to heaven," I sighed, as I said the last word and Cody and I went to sit down.

"Good job, honey," mom whispered to us both. I'd really missed her. I still missed Zack, but had begun to except it. I knew there was no way in hell I could ever 'live normally' again.

**A/N So, this chapter was a bit longer. Oh, and I decided that Muriel's dead. Anyway, please tell me what you think! (Cos I'm really sick of not having many reviews). And if every chapter I've written has a review, I'll try to update the next day. So, if you review, I'll work hard to get the next chapter up faster…understand? Anyway, thanks for reading!**

**Question (Even though no-one answers): Do you prefer TSLOZAC or TSLOD and why?**

**My answer: The Suite Life of Zack and Cody, because I hate The Suite Life on Deck. **


	5. Chapter 4

**Cody's POV**

After the funeral we went to London's suite, I'm not sure why, but I think Mosby's getting sick of us. My roommate, Travis, didn't like me anyway. London isn't as air-headed as she was before Zack's death. It's changed all of us. I was never that close to Zack, I was closer to Max, although he was closer to Max than I was. They used to tease me a lot, and were always in the same class. Now Zack's gone, and it felt like the end of the world.

In London's suite, she seems to be trying to get on with life. She always had a soft spot for Zack, like Maddie had one for Max. I was just the third wheel. Or the fifth wheel, I guess. London sat down on her pink couch, and Max and I followed. She looked Max up and down, then said, "You really need a manicure," taking her hand.

"Oh-kay," Max said, London already filing and getting paint ready.

"Hey, London," I said, making her look at me. "Can I take a walk?"

"Sure! Just don't get lost," she said with a smile.

I knew exactly where I was going. Zack would do it for me, so why couldn't I do it for him? Well, Max would probably do a better job. I was Cody Martin, not Zack Martin's 'twin' or 'clone'. I wasn't Max's plan B, or her side-kick, I was Cody Martin. My own person.

But thinking about Max brought thoughts to my mind, thoughts about suicide. I wouldn't commit suicide, but Max tried. "I promise," the words repeated in my mind. "I promise. I promise. I promise." I kept telling myself that on the way to do Zack justice. But then more words came into my mind, words I'd almost forgotten.

"**Promises are made to be broken,"**

The thought of being a singleton (non-multiple. IE in your mom's tummy on your own) scared me. I couldn't let Max kill herself. _She's with London_ I told myself again and again. I wanted to go back, but wanted to do Zack justice more. _I'll be quick_ I told myself, as I was almost there.

But when I arrived the nerves kicked in, shakily I knocked on Tapeworm's, or I should say Mathew's, door. His mom, a woman I recognised, came to the door. "Oh, Cody," she said, indulging () me in a hug. "Is Max here?" she asked.

"No, just me," I tried to smile, but just couldn't. "Uh-could I speak to Mathew a second?" I asked.

"Sure, I'm so sorry about your loss by the way. I can't tell you how sorry I am. We're sending him away to a group home tomorrow, but you can speak to him now. He's in his room,"  
I went up the stairs to Tapeworm's room, anger rushing through me. I burst the door open and was about to shout when I took in the sight around me. All Tapeworm's collections had been presumably disposed of (thrown away). And the majority of his youngest sisters stuff was moved into his room, and sat on the floor, was a bald Tapeworm. I paused for a moment, but then I had to shout. "You fucking asshole! You murdered my brother!" I'm not one to swear, but under these circumstances, I thought it was necessary. "You've ruined my family! I can't believe I ever trusted a dick-head like you!"

"I'm sorry, Cody," Tapeworm looked sincere, but I didn't trust him. I was there. I know exactly what happened. Zack and Tapeworm had a fight, so Zack told him there was no way in hell he'd have his permission to go out with Max (A secret we both kept was that he liked her). And then Zack pretended to be on the phone talking to Max, and Tapeworm threatened to kill him. The next thing I saw was Zack and Tapeworm by the window of the highest room in school. Tapeworm yelled; "I'm sorry Zack," then pushed him, "That I'm not sorry!"

I fought back tears. "No. You're not sorry."

"Is that all you came to say?" he asked tiredly.

"No." I stood my ground and couldn't believe what I was about to do. "I came to give you this." I punched him hard on the jaw and, before he could retaliate, ran for the open window. Putting my arm on the ledge, I jumped through easily and landed on my feet. I couldn't believe what I'd just done, I mean, for Zack it'd be no big deal, but for me?! I can do anything Zack could do.

I ran home, panting, pleased with myself. But a part of me was missing. Usually, that'd be a team effort from Zack and me, whenever anyone insulted Max. Although, usually she'd defend herself also. My thoughts went to Max. I wondered how she was doing with London. They usually could last about half an hour before they tried to kill each other. Complete opposites. London loved spending her dad's money on stuff she didn't need and spending time on hair and make-up, whereas Max liked to make the money herself, and didn't care about looks. That's where they clash. London wants to make Max look pretty, and Max hates it. She could bare nails, but she'll go mental at haircuts or make-up.

As I walk in, luckily neither's dead. Max is talking to London, and London actually looks like she's listening. As I get closer, I realize that she's talking about basketball. I helped win the championships (sorta) by the ball bouncing off my head. But they're not talking about that, they're talking strategy. Max is best at strategy, best on the team. Well, she was. I don't think she'll want to play next year. Max is changing, she's becoming more of a girl. She won't change in front of us now, and once I caught her stuffing her bra. She's been wearing her hair down recently, too. I guess she is a girl, if she wasn't our triplet she'd probably be girly anyway.

.

The next day we had to go to school. I didn't want to, and neither did Max, but we had to clear out our lockers and stuff. We took the bus to school for once, something we rarely did, and all the kids stared at us. Everyone started whispering as we sat at the front. Usually, Drew and his crew sat at the back, Drew in the middle. Now, Drew was only a row or two behind us, and his crew were at the back with…Bob?

Bob's a boy in our class with dyslexia. Zack liked him, and probably would've been friends with him if it wasn't for Max. He was particularly mean to Max behind our backs, and when she told us we immediately stopped speaking to him. I don't get how Bob became so popular, but he did. Drew saved Max's life, and has been nice to her recently, which is probably why he lost all his cool. We were never cool in the first place.

The ride to school was quiet, Max and I kept glancing to each other, but that was it. When we got to school, Bob came over to us.

"Hey, twins," he said.

"We're triplets," Max grumbled.

"Yeah, whatever,"

"Not whatever, we're triplets,"

"Lesbian," he muttered a Max made a shocked face. "Anyway, the teacher says we've all got to be nice to you, so I'm sorry for your loss.

"Fuck off," Max said, as he walked away.

"Max!" I said in shock, "Why do you have to be so mean to everyone?"

"I'm not," she replied defensively, as we walked towards our lockers.

I don't know how, but we managed to get through the day. All the teachers sympathized with us, and didn't really care that we didn't do anything. No-one spoke to us, but we didn't really care. As it was our last day before summer vacation, (we were allowed to skip the last four weeks) Drew came to say goodbye, then we left.

Mom picked us up from the bus stop, we could've walked, but I was glad to see her.

"Mommy," I yelled, stepping off the bus and hugging her. I could hear the other kids laughing, but I didn't care. I just hugged my mom tighter, so glad to see her again. She hugged me back and muttered, "Cody,"

I saw Max over her shoulder, barely even noticing us. Scraping her shoe against the floor and staring into the distance. My fears of her committing suicide grew, so I ran over to her and hugged her.

Max made one her creped-out faces and half-hugged I back. "I love you, Max," I muttered.

"Well, can you love me a little less?" she joked, pushing me off her. I suddenly realized I was hugging a little too tight, but I realized that she'd made a joke. Even if a little one, it meant stuff was getting better, a little. But it made me feel guilty. I was guilty that I was carrying on without Zack. It should've been me. I should've died. Max wouldn't have cared as much. Zack would've beat the shit out of Tapeworm, but that'd be it. That's the thing about us Martin triplets, we always stuck together.

But it can't be like that anymore. We need to live without Zack.

**A/N So, new POV for this chapter, I just thought we needed to see things from Cody's POV as well, but I might not do it again. Anyway, thanks to Boris Yeltsin and 'hi' (guest) for reviews, it means a lot. And (hint, hint) reviews remind me to update. Unfortunately, however, today was my first day back at school, and I'm in year 9 now. To Americans that probably doesn't mean much, but at my school all the work and homework we do will determine if we're allowed to do certain GCSE's, and our sets, so I'll be quiet busy. Sorry for rambling x**

**And the question no-one answers: Do you like Cody's POV, or should I stick to Max? And who else's POV might you like to see?**

**My answer: I prefer Max, but don't mind either way.**

**Oh, and also, soon they'll go to summer camp. So, if you wanna come up with an OC for me to use, please do! Just put it in the comments!**

**Laura x**


	6. FLASHBACK 2

**FLASHBACK**

_When the Martin triplets were eight, their mom decided they should spend the summer with their dad. Kurt was very busy over the summer, and after two weeks sent the trio to summer camp for a week._

_It was a good camp, but the three were fairly nervous. As they walked in wearing their Lake Camp caps and jackets with Max in the middle, it was obvious they were triplets. The three liked it that way. Max and Zack put on confident faces, whilst Cody showed his fear. Kurt had just left, so they needed to check in. _

"_See you later," Max said, walking over to the 'Girls Check-in,' sign. Zack slightly waved while he and Cody walked to the boys section. _

"_Name," a woman said to Max, trying to smile. _

"_Maxine Martin," Max replied, as the woman looked through papers. She was eight, but grown up for her age. _

"_Ah, yes. You're in cabin G9, and group 4. John will show you the way." Max nodded, as she started to follow the man to her cabin._

_Meanwhile, Zack and Cody were checking in._

"_Okay, Zack you're in cabin B6 and Cody you're in B5. You're both in group 4," the woman smiled._

_Cody felt a tear in his eye. "A-aren't we together?" he asked._

"_You're in the same group, with your sister." The woman smiled. "Henry will show you to your cabins." Cody cried more as the woman dismissed the twins._

_When they arrived in their separate cabins, none of the trio ended up 'happy'._

_Max walked into her cabin and put her stuff on the only remaining bed. The room was small. All they had was a bunk bed, single bed and a bathroom area. Max sighed, sitting on the bottom bunk and looking at the two other girls. They were too distracted with their dolls to even notice she'd come in._

"_Uh, hi?" she tried._

"_Hello," a girl in pink said with a smile. "Got any dolls?"_

_Max shook her head, tiredly. "I have toy cars,"_

"_They're boys' toys!" the other girl laughed._

"_No. My mommy says that girls and boys can play with the same toys," Max argued._

"_No, my mommy says cars are for boys,"_

"_But my mommy's right," Max argued. _

"_No, my mommy is,"_

_Soon all three girls were arguing a lot._

_Meanwhile, Zack walked into his identical cabin, to be greeted very differently. _

"_Are you Zackary?" A boy wearing glasses asked, getting right in his face._

"_It's Zack," Zack backed away slightly before looking at the other boy. The other looked about 10, but seemed to act eight._

"_Where would you like to sleep?" Glasses asked, sniffling. "We wanted you to choose."  
Zack was even more weirded out by these two nerds, so just said. "I'm on top at home, so that's easiest," and sat down. Glasses introduced himself as Rover (Which creeped Zack out) and the other was called Ben. He couldn't wait to get to dinner._

_All the while, Cody walked into his cabin full of tears. He'd never been apart from his siblings for as long as he could remember. They were in the same class, the same room. He was the middle kid, so un-born with Max, then born with Zack. When one was in the bathroom, two were outside. (Or just Max when the boys bathed together). So for Cody, the idea of spending a week in a different room was scary. It was for all of them, but only Cody showed it._

_As he entered, the mess was the first thing he saw. The room was half the size of the one at home, and a lot more cramped. "Aw, look, the nerds crying," a large boy said, taking a bit of his chocolate bar. _

"_Hey, nerd. Nice sweater-vest," the other jeered, throwing a rapper on the floor. Cody quickly put his stuff down and started to cry._

_._

_The following day, the Martin trio met up at breakfast to discuss their situations. Max had had an evening of doll tea-party's, Zack's had been full of nerd feast, but Cody had suffered torments. The food was fine, so were the activities. In fact, the three had a good day. Till it was time to return to the cabins._

_Zack had another evening of nerd-fests._

_Max had her cars nicked, while being teased._

_Cody was beaten up._

_And that's why, at 3AM, the trio had had enough. Max, who couldn't sleep, came outside to see if she could talk to Zack. Cody had ran out as they hit him, desperate to get to Zack. Max looked over her injured brother, as they stood outside the cabin._

"_You okay?" she whispered, getting a shaky nod as they knocked on the door._

"_Yes," Rover said, appearing at the door._

"_Can we talk to Zack?" Max asked._

"_Oh…no. You see, he's asleep right now, ad said if we bothered him he'd kill us,"_

"_Please," Cody begged, looking at the posters inside._

"_Get out the way!" Max pushed the large boy to the side and went into the cabin, over to Zack's bed. "Get up, dufus," she half yelled, pulling his leg till he got out of bed. _

"_What is it?" he asked, sleepily coming to the door. _

"_Macy and Becca stole my car!" she whined. _

"_And I got beat up!" Cody cried._

"_You're lucky to have us, right Zacky?" Ben put his arm around Zack._

"_So lucky," he lied. "Uh, I'm just gonna talk to my brother and sister," he quickly pulled away and exited the cabin with his siblings._

"_This camp is horrible," they all said at once._

_And although they managed to move cabins, they still saw their former room-mates, and kept one thing in mind;_

_**Camp is horrible.**_

**A/N I finally finished this chapter! Sorry it's been, like, ages, I hade school and homework. Basically, year 9's a really important year (not as important as 10 and 11, but) and I'm not going to do all my homework on the morning bus anymore, so I don't have the time I used to. Also, I'm going to get a job soon (if I can find one at 13, if not in June I'll get one) and I basically have no time. And since my dad keeps taking my laptop off me, when I have time I can't go on it.**

**Anyway, I hope you liked this chapter, please tell me what you think!**

**Laura x**


	7. Chapter 5

**Max's POV**

After school, we hung out at moms for a bit. We mostly just watched TV, while she told us about her therapy. Then she offered to cook, but I said I would. Everything's easier that way. I made spaghetti, then we all sat down and ate.

"Where are we staying tonight?" Cody asked as mom shrugged.

"Mr. Mosby says you're going to camp soon, so probably his." Mom replied. And, sure enough, after dinner, Mr. Mosby turned up.

"Maxine, Cody can I talk to you a minute?" he asked, as we both got up and walked over to him. "The plan is for you to go to summer camp tomorrow, so please pack. Tonight you're staying at mine."

We both nodded, going into our room. We rarely went in there, as it was filled with memories of Zack. We knew what to bring from the last time we went to camp, but we weren't particularly excited. We'd hated camp when we were little, all three of us, so we knew this would probably be the same.

When we got to Mr. Mosby's, it was kinda nice seeing Lola.

"Hey," she smiled, leading me into her room. It was gone midnight when we arrived, so she obviously wasn't in the mood for talking. I just sat on the spare bed, changed into my pyjama's (it was nice bringing my own stuff) and went to sleep. I didn't struggle falling asleep, surprisingly, but I still felt a pang of guilt. Like, even though your life's fallen apart, you need to carry on. Even though nothing will go back to the way you knew it, you have no choice but to live on. No choice but to live on without Zack.

.

The next morning consisted of waking up early, showering, and getting on a strange bus. Mr. Mosby explained that for the first week we'd be together doing 'Multi Activity', then I was to spend two weeks dancing, while he designed a video game. After that, we'd come back to his for a night and decide what we wanted to do. We hated the thought of being separated, but I guess we had no choice.

"Welcome to Brookhaven," a man said, gesturing the two of us onto the bus. I slightly waved at Mr. Mosby, confidently hopping onto the bus. I had to seem confident. Cody was no way near confident. I could hear him from behind me. He started to cry. He started to scream. He started to yell.

"Mr. Mosby! Please don't leave us! I don't wanna go!" I watched him thrust his arms around Mr. Mosby, desperate to stay in Boston. I couldn't hear what Mr. Mosby said in response, but I could hear the people behind me.

"What. A. Dork." A girl who sounded about 9 was saying.

"Hey, ponytail," the boy next to her called, making me turn around. "Do you know that dweeb?"  
I nodded, not wanting to pick a fight on day one. "He's not a dweeb."

I could hear them both roll their eyes. I didn't care enough. Soon Cody got on, shaky and tear-faced. He sat next to me and I smiled. But he just cried harder. Soon he stopped, I think, but I mostly had my head phones in.

.

It was a few hours till we finally arrived. By then, Cody had already nagged me about needing to pee a few times. We really wanted to arrive, although we were a bit nerves. The bus only had about 20 people on it, and most people were just sat on their own, but the leader (whose name we learnt to be Matt) kept trying to get us to talk to people.

"Looks like we're just on time," he commented as we arrived. "Great, now take all your belongings and go into that hall,"

We did as told, and entered the room where two woman were stood. They sent us off to our bunks (which I was sad to leave Cody for) and then expected us to just settle. I was so caught up in the excitement of things, I forgot to think about Zack.

Upon entering my bunk, I was greeted by four smiling faces and one scowl.

"Are you Maxine?" The scowling girl asked, chewing gum and looking down at me.

"Yep," I said, smiling although I just wanted to cry.

"Oh, that's your bed. We had to 'reserve' a top bunk for you,"

"I don't really care, but thanks," I said, walking over to the bed.

"I wanted it," the girl scowled.

"That's Maura," a blonde girl explained, gesturing to the black-haired scowling girl. "She's been like this all day."  
"Max," I said, smiling slightly as I held out my hand.

"Hailee," she smiled.

"So, where are you from?" another girl asked. "I'm Jenna,"  
"I live in the Tipton hotel," I said, without thinking.

"The Tipton?!" a red-haired girl asked in surprise.

"Yeah, me and my…" I didn't know what to say. Brother? Brothers? Triplets? Family? So I just said, "Triplet."

"You're a triplet?" she asked again as I nodded. "I'm Bonnie, by the way, and that's Zoey," she pointed to a girl who was reading.  
"Cool," I nodded, as they all started talking about their homes and families. I was tired, and wanted Zack there.

"What about your triplets?" Jenna asked.

"Uh, Cody…and Zack," I tried to sound confident. I didn't want the sympathy vote, after having the bed.

"What are they like?" Bonnie asked.

"Cool," I really didn't want to talk about this.

"Come on, they must annoy you!" Maura said, as the others nodded.

"Well, Cody's quiet nerdy and childish. And Zack thinks he's so cool and annoying." I felt quite bad, but wanted friends.

"Are they here?" Zoey asked.

"Cody is," I said simply. I looked at Bonnie, and she nodded, as though understanding, and changed the subject.

But I had friends. And I liked camp.

.

Soon two more girls came. Ashly and Lili. Ashly made it clear she didn't want to be here, and that she hated us.

"Stay out of my way, and I'll stay out of yours," she flipped her perfect hair and put her headphones on.

Lili was obviously shy, but smiled and came to sit with me as we all spoke. The camp was alright, and I only had a small pang of guilt.

**A/N Thanks so much for all my reviews! I hope you liked this chapter, and if you read All About Max, yes I am re-using some OC's, because I'm really stuck for idea's. Next chapter will be Cody's POV and have the character Boris Yeltsin came up with, so I'll update soon.**

**Question: Have you reviewed yet?**

**My answer: If not, please tell me what you think! If you have, thanks so much, I hope you liked this chapter.**


	8. Murderouse life

**Tapeworm's POV**

As I tried to sleep, the guilt haunted me again. I hadn't slept in weeks, and being at this place didn't help. I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up with a knife in my back. But it was all my own fault. Mom and dad were ashamed to even admit to me being their son, so now I was stuck here. Till I was 18 and would be left on the street to starve. I sighed, turning over in bed again.

"Stay fucking still!" Jonny, the boy on the bed above me, half-yelled. I hated this place. When I arrived, it was late at night. And I was met with a bed someone had pissed in for a laugh. Since then, I've had people run in on me in the shower, beat me, and boss me around.  
All I could think about was Max.

She wasn't like other girls. Yes, she had beautiful hair and a pretty face. But this wasn't her identity. Very few people could even tell you it was brown, as I was always hidden, people assumed it was blonde like her brothers. She was more likely to beat you up than hug you, and enjoyed whipping you ass at video games instead of getting you to show her how.

But I'd ruined her. I'd hurt her. Just so I didn't have to live with knowing we were forbidden to see each other. Now I have to live with knowing she hates me. Knowing I'll never see her again and knowing the perfect girl is gone forever.

I have to live in this place, knowing, thinking and regretting every day.

I gave up everything, but I made Max give up more.

**A/N So, I'm really, really supper sorry I haven't updated in ages, and that this is so bad. I'm struggling with the Cody-camp chapter, but I'll try my hardest to get through it. I might put up a triplets-tapeworm flashback as well, but for now I just did an insight into a murders perspective.**

**Again, sorry it's been so long and that this is so bad.**

**Please review!**


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